Nov 17

Shakable Confidence Stinks!

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Welcome to another edition of Unshakable, Unbreakable, Unstoppable Stories with Bonnie Jean.

Have you ever wanted something but only had a brief amount of time to choose to chase that dream to try to get what you wanted? Except by the time you chose to go after it, it was too late?

I have.

Now I always have to wonder ‘what if?’ I’m never going to get another chance, and I’m never going to know for sure if I could have made it.

I’m talking about the chance I had in high school to play Division I softball in college.

I wanted to be good enough to compete at the top level of college competition. Looking back now, I know I could have been if I had just tried.

So why didn’t I?

The answer comes down to this: I didn’t have enough confidence in my softball skills to even attempt to play softball at a Division I college.

I knew I was a decent player, but I never let myself see how good I was. I was too busy pointing out my mistakes to anyone who would listen, secretly comparing myself to every other player on my team and trash talking to me about me.

Even when my coaches, teammates and parents would encourage me, I didn’t want to listen. I thought I needed to be negative and hard on myself to become a better player, so I didn’t want their praise or encouragement.

To be honest, I was downright grouchy and unbearable to be around if I played a bad game!

I realize how wrong I was now, but back then, I seriously believed the way to make myself better was to mentally beat myself up on a regular basis. And I believed the way to keep from being cocky and obnoxious was to focus on my mistakes, not praise my successes.

As a result of my negative mindset, I killed my own confidence. So as much as I wanted to play Division I college softball, I didn’t want to endure the embarrassment of not making a Division I team at the college of my choice.

I did want to play softball in college, though, so my goal was to find a small college that had a varsity softball program. That’s why I didn’t even consider attending a Division I school.

I chickened out on pushing myself to be my best because I had no confidence.

Part of me regrets that decision; the other part is glad I had the college experience I did. Still, I’ll always have to wonder if I could have made it at the next level.

Don’t lose your chance to be your best. If you want something, go for it no matter how scared you are.

Learn what it takes to be good, then practice DOING the skills you learn. The more action you take, the stronger your confidence will become.

To Your Dreams,
Bonnie Jean

P.S. Please don’t wait as long as I did to find your unshakable confidence! No matter how old you are, you can be an unshakable, unbreakable, unstoppable Dream Doer today! To help, I want to give you three FREE gifts, which includes the entire audio book of The Dream Doers and the Summer of Secrets. To claim your FREE gifts, visit TheDreamDoers.com now.

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Nov 10

What Happens to Your Dreams When Confidence is Missing?

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Welcome to another edition of Unshakable, Unbreakable, Unstoppable Stories with Bonnie Jean.

My big dream in high school was to be a super star athlete in all three sports I played: volleyball, basketball and softball.

I could see myself winning games for my teams at the last second, collecting all kinds of awards at the end of each season and having dozens of college scouts offer me scholarships to their schools.

Those dreams sure were exciting. They filled me with hope and gave me a reason to go to practice every day. Too bad I wasn’t a talented enough athlete to be a super star and make those big dreams come true!

I was, however, a good athlete. I had enough talent to be a starter on my volleyball and softball teams all four years, and after playing a lot of minutes coming off the bench on my basketball team my first three years, I earned my way into a starting role by my senior year.

In other words, I had enough talent to be one of the better players on my teams. What I never had enough of, though, was confidence. Especially in basketball.

When I stepped onto a softball field, I believed I was good. I just never believed I was great. But I’ll share more in another episode about my shakable softball confidence and how that limited my softball success. Today I want to focus on my nonexistent basketball confidence.

When I stepped onto a basketball court, I believed I was lousy. I had no confidence at all in my ability to shoot or dribble the basketball, play defense or rebound. And because I kept telling myself I was a lousy basketball player, I never let myself gain the confidence I needed to become good.

Every time I took a shot, I was afraid the other team would block it. Or I was afraid I’d miss the rim entirely and shoot an embarrassing air ball.

Every time I caught a pass or had to dribble, I was afraid the other team would steal it.

Every time I had a player to defend, I was afraid she would dribble by me or shoot the ball and hit a shot in my face.

Every time I went for a rebound, I was afraid someone bigger and stronger would push me out of the way and take the ball from me.

I spent a lot of time being afraid and not a lot of time building my skills so that I wouldn’t have to be afraid to step onto a basketball court any more.

I’ll always have to wonder how good I could have been as a high school basketball player. I lost my chance to be good. Don’t lose yours. If you want something, go for it no matter how scared you are.

Learn what it takes to be good, then practice DOING the skills you learn. The more action you take, the stronger your confidence will become.

To Your Dreams,
Bonnie Jean

P.S. Please don’t wait as long as I did to find your unshakable confidence! No matter how old you are, you can be an unshakable, unbreakable, unstoppable Dream Doer today! To help, I want to give you three FREE gifts, which includes the entire audio book of The Dream Doers and the Summer of Secrets. To claim your FREE gifts, visit TheDreamDoers.com now.

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Nov 03

The Success Secret that Would Have Made Me a Great High School Athlete

Motivating Stories, Success Secrets No Comments »

Welcome to another edition of Unshakable, Unbreakable, Unstoppable Stories with Bonnie Jean.

I couldn’t wait to be old enough to go to high school for one reason: sports.

My older sisters all played high school sports, and I was jealous of the fact that they got to practice or play a game every single day after school. So when it was finally my turn to be in high school and play high school sports, I was going to take advantage of it by playing at least one sport all year long.

In the fall of my freshman year, I started with a sport I had never played before: volleyball.

I had to try out for the team before school even started. Even though I had no idea how to play the game, I made the junior varsity team that year. I was so excited. I loved being part of a team and working hard every day in practice.

But the problem I had was that I worked a little too hard at not making any mistakes.

I thought that if the coach saw me make lots of bad passes or hit lots of balls out of bounds, I wouldn’t be able to play in any of the matches and would have to sit the bench all season.

So I practiced with caution. I wouldn’t hit the ball as hard as I could because I was afraid of hitting it too hard and messing up. Or I would hesitate when the ball came near me because I was afraid that if I called the ball, I might miss it or make a bad pass.

By not hitting as hard as I could, I never learned to control my power. And by not going all out and being aggressive as a passer or setter, I never learned what I could and could not get to or how to make good passes in tough situations.

In other words, I didn’t let myself make enough mistakes in practices to ever be great in games. I never became a great athlete because I never let myself be a really bad athlete first.

That’s why any time I try something new today, I make as many mistakes as I can as fast as I can. By letting myself mess up, I don’t have to worry about being perfect. I’m allowed to make mistakes so I can learn how to fix them and not make those same mistakes again.

It’ll work for you, too.

When you try something new, make as many mistakes as you can as fast as you can. You’ll be amazed at how fast you learn new skills and how much faster you gain confidence in your ability to succeed.

To Your Dreams,
Bonnie Jean

P.S. Please don’t wait as long as I did to find your unshakable confidence! No matter how old you are, you can be an unshakable, unbreakable, unstoppable Dream Doer today! To help, I want to give you three FREE gifts, which includes the entire audio book of The Dream Doers and the Summer of Secrets. To claim your FREE gifts, visit TheDreamDoers.com now.

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